Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly blog hop where participants post eight to ten sentences of their writing. You can find out more about it by clicking on the image.
Continuing with a scene from Wrath of Empire, a prequel to my first novel, Ghosts of Innocence. Commander Gregor Pavlenko is overseeing maintenance on a giant plasma cannon on board battleship Wrath of Empire. Last week ended with his lieutenant saying: “You always get that faraway look in your eyes.” She grinned. “It’s kinda cute, you know.”
“There’s nothing cute about taking your responsibility seriously.” He glanced once more at the dancing lights of the dashboard. Progress was good, but they’d be at it for hours yet.
Gregor swiveled in his seat and gazed across the room to where a small army of intruders crawled behind and under his familiar battle consoles, wrestling a snake pit of wiring harnesses out from open floor panels and knitting them into the fabric of his world. In some sense, he felt violated, but he brushed off the feeling. This was the empire’s new toy. New levels of automation to bring a clinical calculation to battle decisions. Progress. He’d better get used to it.
That’s nine sentences. The scene continues ...
Following the line of his gaze, Una said, “The techs report they’re close to finished hooking their control lines in.”
“So,” Gregor whispered, “it’ll have its finger on the trigger for real this time.”
“With loads of safeties and aborts in between.” Una’s voice was light, but the set of her shoulders said otherwise.
10 comments:
Why don't those 'safety features' make me feel they are any safer? Gregor's wise to feel uncomfortable with them.
Oh yeah, surely nothing can go wrong with this new setup....where have we heard this before? Enjoyed the excerpt! Nice foreshadowing (I'm assuming) for whatever is to come.
Love your world building. You paint such a vivid picture with your words. Nicely written!
Not exactly feeling any safer with that! Great snippet!
Nancy, what's worse (though not shown yet) is that those safety features are only there during testing.
Veronica, the weaknesses of the arrangement will make themselves felt in time.
Julie, thanks.
Danii, who says you're supposed to feel safe? :)
I can feel all of Gregor's doubts and anxiousness from your words. Well written!
Yeah I'm sure nothing can go wrong in such a scenario. You've shown the characters trepidations very well, and i'm sure their concerns are justified.
I immediately thought of the 1980s movie Wargames, where they found out how much such technology was a VERY BAD IDEA. I hope this groups doesn't find out the same thing. Great descriptive language--I can see it as the action unfolds. Tweeted.
Hi Ian - I can't help but feel there's a lot that could go wrong here ... all the best as you continue - cheers Hilary
"...a snake pit of wiring harnesses" Great description.
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