Sunday, June 15, 2014

Weekend Writing Warriors June 15

Weekend Writing Warriors is a weekly blog hop where participants post up to eight sentences of their writing. You can find out more about it by clicking on the image below.
http://www.wewriwa.com/

Last week's snippet seemed almost restful, apart from the heat. This next part, a few sentences on, should put the waiting into context...

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Hot, dirty, scratched to shreds from days of bushwhacking, Shayla listened to the forest, small animals foraging, birds calling. Dragonflies with jeweled wings a foot across patrolled the clearing. Shayla charted the sounds in her mind's eye, noting a region of stillness to her right. Someone else was waiting.

That was according to plan, but she had to be sure there wasn't yet another party watching the watchers. What was the chance that her local contacts had been followed here?

She scanned the edge of the clearing for signs of danger. She detected nothing but the sounds and movements of the forest.

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22 comments:

  1. Hey Ian :) You're continuing the tension here and giving it a bit of a different feel with the introduction of possible spies. I love how you create atmosphere! I find myself thinking about your characters days later.

    I didn't sign up this week but had to make sure I popped over here to read more!

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  2. Ditto to Marcia's comment - great tension… intriguing character.
    I think it's time I visited Amazon to get a copy.

    Cheers - and Happy Father's Day to you, Ian. I hope your family has a little something planned for you… you deserve it.

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  3. Love this book, Ian. You have a five star review coming from me. I'll get it up in the next day or two.

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  4. Sounds as if her directional hearing is excellent.

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  5. Marcia, tension is what I'm after...the life under cover...who to trust?

    Hi Jenny, the kids are well-behaved this weekend and not arguing, that's as much as any father could wish for :)

    Teresa, thanks so much! Have you finished? I really hope the ending was satisfying after all the build-up!

    Cara, that's what I'm hoping for :)

    Sue Ann, her senses are sharp through years of training and healthy paranoia!

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  6. Shayla listened to the forest. You caught me right there with gorgeous description and tension. Thanks.

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  7. Love the way you use her senses to build the setting and the danger lurking within. If Teresa loved this book then I guess I better read it!

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  8. Ooh, loved this. She's so amazingly observant and I could picture the setting very clearly. Excellent excerpt!

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  9. Everybody's so on their toes and woods-skilled in this story. Impressive--and probably a good idea, with this cat and mouse hunt they have going on.

    The question is--who's in control?

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  10. Charmaine, I love description, I think it shows :)

    Alexis, you can sample a fair way in and see if you want to continue before committing $$.

    Veronica, when your life depends on it, senses tend to sharpen.

    Caitlin, we've barely started the cat & mouse part yet :)

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  11. Fabulous description. I love how she listens to everything around her. Very visual.

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  12. I'm enjoying these excerpts very much. Your descriptions are fab.

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  13. Tina, that is exactly how I imagine her listening - a visual rather than auditory experience.

    Elaine, glad you're enjoying them. More to come...

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  14. Great descriptions. I felt like I could see it (hear it?)--excellent melding of the two senses.

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  15. you managed to appeal right to the readers' senses with your vivid description. Great 8.

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  16. Intense scene! Definitely felt her worry.

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  17. I could feel the tension! Great snippet.

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  18. Sounds pretty tense. I can almost imagine sitting there, waiting with bated breath.

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  19. Karysa, the senses are just our windows into the world, the question is how do we perceive it in our mind?

    Chelle, thanks.

    Karen, she has a lot to worry about!

    Karen, thanks.

    Misha, the waiting is almost over :)

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  20. Shayle has the instincts of an animal. Listening and feeling the movements around her. Slowly making sure everything is safe. Love the detail,and the intensity!

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I love comments. Please feel free to join in the discussion.

I also try to respond to comments. I usually do so during the early evening (Pacific time) which may be many hours away from now!

So if you leave a comment and return some time later and I haven't responded yet, please don't think I'm ignoring you. I'm not. Honest.

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